SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are breaking through our limited belief system, challenging what we’ve always known, to find the other half of the ham. Have you ever really thought about where your ideas and opinions come from? Maybe through experience, trials, and tribulations, but how many were planted, early in life, never to be challenged? So many times we adopt an idea as fact or tradition and never question “why”. Why am I still doing this and that and could there be a different, more productive, more joyful, or more successful way? Today we won’t accept: “well, that’s just the way it is, what I’ve always done” without some further exploration.
So the other half of the ham. I better explain this concept as a basis for our talk. I heard this “joke” if you will that hit me with more than just laughter. It opened my eyes to the pitfalls of just accepting something as fact because that’s what we were told, Lord knows when. This goes against my grain because I know for fact, that we are always changing. Not just the world, and all its improvements, but US – we are growing and changing daily so what might have been an idea or opinion that served us in the past, without challenge, we don’t know if it serves us now or in the future.
So this little girl is in the kitchen with her mother preparing a ham for dinner. She notices that she cuts off the end of the ham and casts it aside. She asks, “Momma, why do you cut off half the ham?” and her mother says, that’s how my mother has always done it. Hmm, let’s call Grandma. So they call Grandma and ask her about cutting off half the ham and she says, “Well, that’s how my mother has always done it, let’s call Granny”. So they give Granny a ring and ask her about this process of cutting off half the ham before you cook it and Granny says…,” Well because that’s what size pan I had”. After you have a good laugh think about that and then think about all the wasted ham because someone, down the line, didn’t question this belief
- Unhealthy Beliefs About Yourself
- Unhealthy Beliefs About Others
- Unhealthy Beliefs About the World
There are many different beliefs you have about yourself, other people, and the world around you. And while you’re likely to think that all of your beliefs are 100 percent accurate, the truth is you likely hold onto at least a few core beliefs that are irrational and unproductive.
Unhealthy beliefs lead to unhealthy habits. And unhealthy habits produce negative outcomes that ultimately reinforce your unhealthy beliefs. It’s a vicious cycle that can be tough to break.
It’s hard to acknowledge all the good in your life when you have challenge after challenge but in reality, isn’t that normal? Even the people you feel “have it all” who seem to be gleaming with success have faced trial after trial. Nothing is easy and even if you are blessed with talent and good luck, you too will fail. It’s a part of life and learning and our journey would be a brisk uneventful walk without it.
Many of us are constantly striving to grow professionally and personally in our lives. Every new year we set aside some time to establish brand new objectives and things we want to achieve. We start the year off with admirable willpower but it’s not uncommon to arrive at a point when our motivation drops off and our plans lose their luster.
Psychologist, Robert M., describes in his research the importance and impact of beliefs in our lives. He says:
“Beliefs are like filters on a camera. What the camera ‘sees’ is a function of the filters through which it is viewing its subject. In other words, how we ‘see’ the world is a function of our beliefs and profoundly influences personality.
As a result of our beliefs, we define ourselves as worthy or worthless, powerful or powerless, competent or incompetent, trusting or suspicious, belonging or outcast, self-reliant or dependent, flexible or judgmental, fairly treated or victimized, loved or hated. Your beliefs have far-reaching consequences, both positive and negative, in your life. Beliefs affect your moods, relationships, job performance, self-esteem, physical health, even your religious or spiritual outlook.”
See how just a slight shift in perspective can open up a whole new world of understanding? Isn’t that exciting. It’s like taking a new route instead of the same one you’ve done hundreds of times in practically a dream state.
I found some additional ideas from challengingmids.org that will help us identify where to start.
Here are just a few…
I do/don’t – We may define ourselves by what we do or do not do. I may say ‘I am an accountant’, which means I do not do marketing and should not even think about it, and consequently fail to sell my services well.
I can’t – We often have limited self-images of what we can and cannot do. If I think ‘I cannot sing’ then I will never try or not go to singing lessons to improve my ability. This is the crux of many ‘I can’t’ statements: we believe our abilities are fixed and that we cannot learn.
I must/mustn’t – We are bound by values, norms, laws, and other rules that constrain what we must and must not do. However, not all of these are mandatory and some are distinctly limiting. If I think ‘I must clean the house every day’ then this robs me of time that may be spent on something more productive.
Once you challenge a former belief to test its validity in your life today it’s time to release it. What doesn’t serve you must go. Just as you do a closet overhaul or a garage cleanout, you too can purge old beliefs to make room for new perspectives.
- Step 1: Write the limiting belief down.
- Step 2: Acknowledge that these are beliefs, not truths!
- Step 3: Try on a different belief.
- Step 4: Take different actions.
CHALLENGE: don’t accept what you’ve always heard and known to be fact and relevant in your life today. Dust off old concepts, explore their origin and meaning, then challenge these ideas with what and who you are today. Release what no longer serves you in preparation for the fresh new perspectives you will encounter on your journey.
I Know YOU Can Do It!