We’ve all heard the words “paralyzed by fear”. The inability to move in any direction and the tendency to stay stuck and obsess with “what if’s”
Have you ever found yourself there? You get a thought and instead of following it down the happy trail you take a side path to doom. The mind is a powerful control center and can shoot holes and inject fear into almost any situation. You then rationalize these thoughts with over-generalized statements like, “makes sense, things NEVER go my way” “I’m always on the short end of the stick”.
How can we cut through these thoughts and institute a reality check?
First, you have to be aware of what is happening. Be mindful when your thoughts start to create the end of the story. “They haven’t called because I probably didn’t have enough experience…” “She left early because I’m sure I said something that offended her” “He isn’t home, I bet he found someone else to talk to” Put a stick in the spoke of the spinning wheel and STICK TO THE FACTS. Stop the story where the facts end. That’s hard to do because naturally, we want to have a complete picture of what we are facing. The issue is, you rarely write a rosy ending.
When you regain control of your thoughts do an inventory. That starts with being present and in the now. Transport yourself back to the present by noticing how your body feels. Where are your feet, wiggle your toes. Stretch out your hands and wiggle your fingers. Roll your shoulders and take in a deep breath. Welcome back.
Now, where is this fear on the needs assessment scale of priorities – is it critical? Are we in harm’s way? How about our loved ones? Is there immediate danger? NO, ok then you have a minute to explore your options. Being reactionary relies on old habits and knee-jerk reactions. Being strategic is first, fully understanding the entire situation and taking your time to find an appropriate solution.
It is true Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength. But courage is feeling fear, not getting rid of fear, and taking action in the face of fear.”
CHALLENGE: The next time your thoughts take you careening off your path and into the ditch, pump the breaks and give yourself a reality check so you can take a step in the right direction.
I know YOU can do it!
Musical Feature: Matt Martino www.mattmartinoband.com